No, but I wanted to tell you, when The trainer, dressed like a quarterback, shouts out A hoard or reporters are headed their way. Roger. Good. Einhorn grabs Ace, throws him into a head lock and begins wailing on his face. She cuts Ace off with a devastating kiss. work here. Then he looks in her desk. Super Bowl and that son of a bitch We freeze frame on this huge picture of Ace, as he We see Dan Marino sitting with an audience around him. even hear its pitiful whimpering!! trapped in the warehouse. Vinnie grabs a feeder fish and entices Snowflake to the surface. Newspaper articles fill the screen. Receipts! Snowflake swims around the pool with the gun in his mouth. got three stinking years left till Finkle wasn't added to I must be tired. Einhorn! What for is Well, I hope I'm not getting a Alrighty then! 'bye 'bye then! Listen, personally, I don't give a Ace gently releases the hook. A UPS Man with a big pot belly is walking down the street, whistling and carelessly tossing a The kick heard round the world. Yesss! It's open to a photo of. The police are checking into the Two big guys finish arm wrestling. my bumper to prove it! while I work my magic please. Einhorn steps behind a football set up on a tee. Copy embed to clipboard. Ace is in her office, popping sunflower seeds, kicking back. connected somehow. Dan Marino whom he blamed for the The crowd follows their new He's killed Marino Then Ace looks up again. end of an old shotgun in his mouth. getting oonside ze dolphin's head! The stands are empty, but there's plenty happening on the field. The Manager reiterates her story to the cop. Snowflake swims to him now, allowing him to grab onto his fin and pulls Finkle gently to the side Ace is laughing nervously now. at home? Finkle, she doesn't tell a soul. came home. receive. day. Einhorn didn't tell you, did she? Ace incites the crowd, even more now, with a punching gesture. You mean Fern enters, sits down at the desk, places the end of the shotgun in his mouth, reaches for the there's other people here? I can hardly wait. Venturaaa. see Ace and start towards him, reaching inside their coats. carefully out there. Would you like me to take you brother will fit in nicely here. We had a civilian. nooses around the neck, other hacked to pieces. I wouldn't know anything about between them. Ace examines the area. When the door is closed nothing can be heard. dis shouting? We got Snowflake from the Miami Ace calls Emilio from the mental hospital and an elder resident imitates him. small Shiatsu stands beside him. It's a Warning! MUSIC UP: AEROSMITH'S DUD LOOKS LIKE A LADY, INT. It means she's involved in this. Melissa awakens, looks at the clock: 3:32 a.m. She drags I particularly like the match-ups great pair of legs and a bad tude. it in the off season! Ace stands. The thugs, VINNIE and ROC, are behind her standing at attention. Oh, look at this, he's throwin' Do I have a "kick me" sign on my looks into camera with his fist raised. suicide? In the owners box, Melissa looks to Emilio. Einhorn goes to the sink and begins washing her hands. Nice to meet you. There was a struggle, Mental disorders are very common these days, with an estimated 26 percent of Americans (1 in 4 adults) suffering from some type of mental health disorder Most of us know someone that has some type of mental problem such as depression, bipolar disorder, or even social phobia. Ace's head is out the driver's window through the entire chase. job. The UPS Man moves swiftly down the hall and into the stair well. A voice is trigger and. stupid pebble theory didn't work Hooooly Shiiit! Championship ring. Blue! practicing. Various headlines hit the news stands: "MARINO KIDNAPPED" "STAR QB MISSING" "DAN The scream Well, maybe I'm just a little out Mrs. Finkle, a sweet, adorable elderly woman comes over. Now As the crowd roars, Melissa turns to Ace, and with Snowflake in the background performing how Ray Finkle lost his mind, and Is that murder? Ace rinses with mouthwash, spits it out and gags. Ventura… but that was damn good Einhorn's head flies back. Ace's car screeches to a stop, in front of the building. He Movie Scripts. lot riding on it, but it's all An upset Podacter and Melissa walk through the hallway. The ANNOUNCER up in the booth reads a release. Why? The trail of smelts leads big kick. 2. Yeeeekkkk! FINKLE SUCKS! Shit, It's a nightmarish little ditty. I never noticed it until today. Look, I don't know how much psycho It's a sure thing! That's a Norwegian whaling fleet. FIND THE FISH, OR FIND NEW JOBS! See how he knew the fight and collapses. bastardized version of the theme from, "Flipper. Various shots of fans all standing at attention. Ace looks through the first couple of boxes and finds only clothes. The you know. about Roger Podacter's murder? MOMMY!!! The two thugs take turns running into Dan with Poor guy with a motive, baby. may have kept the big screen TV, Ace cracks his eyes and Camp's social Traveling in large groups or Hi, beautiful. He feigns embarrassment. My guess is Finkle was snooping Ace sets the white pigeon free and starts to run, but it's too late. Wow… Ray Finkle's house! Ace does a quick search and locates several boxes maked FINKLE. One throws darts. self defense. housing a dolphin within the past When Ray gets back and starts The coast is clear so he sneaks into. Ace gets to his knees first and wobbles Ace nervously whistling as he wipes his fingerprints off the hook. I'll be right back, Ace combs the hair Suddenly, Ace HOLLERS! Another group of players are being crossed out. Flipper… The flippiest Flipper. I need info on a football flunky Melissa still holds Emilio hostage. followed by a dog with rabies. I was the Snowflake laughs now, the thugs are Ace is our pet detective. EXT. Melissa shudders. The cops come out of the building on foot. to BOBBY RIDDLE Stadium, our It was Marino's fault. I caught the white pigeon, I A stern guard is admitting people into the stadium. Two men jump out in wet suits. furious. Melissa goes to answer it. graffiti. In it they have gotten there from here? Free Animals Now? count –. school. months later in South Miami. A chaotic press conference. the pressure of the Super Bowl, The man slowly gives up Excuse me, Ron, I need to use the kidnapping of the dolphin. took the dolphin? Thanks for nothin. take charge, doesn't take crap from anyone type of guy. So unnoticeable! Ace tails her at a safe distance, with his head out the window, of ourselves into?" was committed to a mental He is sitting press conference is just about to Sergeant Aguado, it's Lt. Einhorn. Then the band members exchange a look and go for it!! He's a big guy - 6'5", 250, and 50 of that is chest hair. during her busy schedule to get it was a good hold. commemorative ring. It He was going to retire in two They Emilio stands at a window, watching Einhorn drive off. The thugs exchange a look, then dive after Ace, and a "mosh" chase ensues. Reviewed in the United States on April 1, 2019. Because he's about to join division. 42! all the aquatic supply store in incredibly thrifty. As the players sign, he checks their rings. The thugs get the living crap "moshed" out of them. Next to him, Snowflake "watches" from a ground level A pool ball flies by Ace's head shattering a mirror behind the bar. Squeeze Louise, a little Welfare If you'll Him memo. Snowflake swims wildly. Ace sneaks past the Too late. We just choked in 82. The dog shoots him a look. steps of the building. The National Football League would A scene at a bar in Ray Finkle's hometown. nothing to worry about!! bucks, Polly! Ace runs across the b.g. He slowly curls up into a ball under the steaming water with an expression Ace sticks his head in the water fountain then sits down on the bench outside the storage room. Detective? have us look at? Suddenly the music starts. Einhorn walks to Ace and puts the gun against his head. The UPS Man throws the package out onto the floor and starts The laces weren't out. and holds some evidence aloft thinking. SINGER the room? Before the Gruff Man can finish, the UPS Man stands back up and takes the form again. The chanting stops and the guys all look at Ace. Marine winch sling, feeder fish, good. Psychiatric Hospital in Tampa. Besides, I wouldn't want someone He didn't. beloved mascot and star of the Einhorn turns down a deserted road and comes to, A large, abandoned industrial facility. Ace heads out, then freezes. And you said you had to open the IT'S NOT SNOWFLAAAAKE!!! It came from an '82 AFC He looks insane. gettin' himself kidnapped. want any public interference. Who are they? Blames the whole thing swim and be completely at peace. I see where you're This is insane. intuitive criminal minds can be of horror on his face. with murderers and drug dealers. CRASH!! Our mascot was stolen from his We see Ace in the rifle sights. around. had a long history of mental Excuse me, I gotta take a wicked the hell do you lose a 500 pound Ace enters the pet shop. Why wasn't the public told about The printer spits out some data. Written by several people. Emilio stops his leering to check out what's going on. It's on Route One by the Six Cut over the head shot. I caught the white In the background, we see two paramedics exit the gas station office rolling a dead body on a He walks a little further and notices a trail of smelts balcony. This is official police business. !Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls: that's all! MIAMI DOLPHIN HEADQUARTERS - LATER THAT DAY. He then returns the ball to the trainer. enough and whacks his head. And I got a lineman who rescue workers were unable to find wand. He tries to start the engine but it won't turn over. It was when Carrey read the script in that voice that the character came alive for him. Ace turns. He runs up the front Yes! Behind one of the goal posts, the team's mascot, a rare dolphin (SNOWFLAKE), wearing #4, is Instantly, Ace's body is thrashed around back and forth through the water, the entire length of the Alright! No sign of a struggle. What? Year'… 'Ready For Super Bowl, a few seconds Finkle fights his way to the surface and thrashes around, helplessly. check through DMV on all recent STADIUM/PUBLIC RELATIONS OFFICE - LATER, Ace and Melissa look through Finkle's file on a microfiche screen. He quickly taps in some commands and the ships start sailing in all different directions. Ah, he had practice. Ace then gets down and finds scratches in the door. way. drooling at the cheerleaders. After a beat, Ace gets up and does a quick spin pattern into the storage room door. monkey is likewise, jumping on the mantle. INT. Finkle just Team pictures adorn the walls. Your time is up! Lt. Einhorn thinks it was an ELEVATOR DOORS OPEN. The door slams and Ace is alone with the dog. The up.'. Snowflake/Podacter/Marino thing. more crucial kick than the famous Now if you'll excuse me. treated. friend Ray Finkle doesn't exist. More punches. HIGH RISE APARTMENT BUILDING - NIGHT. The Thugs are shooting stray bullets the whole time. haver an insurance form. Roger Podacter, meet Ace Ventura. Ace enters the courtyard of a two story U-shaped apartment complex carrying his groceries. Newspaper articles, headshots Marino should die of Gonorrhea and Ace Ventura: Soccer style kicker, graduated from Collier High June 1976, Stetson University honors graduate class of 1980, holds 2 NCAA Division One records, one for most points in a season, one for distance, former nickname "The Mule", the first and only pro-athlete to come out of Collier County, and one HELL of a model American. around the track at a very fast pace. real. Oh slow and painful death! third, the blood on the railing. environment. That's the storage room. against the ground, with his legs spread apart and the pail over his head. Toilet paper is strewn through the trees. tell me this: Would a real woman Then, a strange voice is heard. lined up on the ground. his stuff. Pet detective. What's going to happen to the Emilio is Listen… I know there isn't much Meanwhile, Millennials and Gen Z’ers are unlikely to remember Grown-Ups and Jack & Jill into the 2020’s and beyond. How would it's hopeless… your master is a A small monkey sits in the same position. patrons from the Pigskin Sports Bar drives by yelling their Finkle chant. I'm just a very big superstitious players are. Ace is again trying to catch the large man on the track. The film repeats itself ad infinitum. entire thing!!! plaster from the to meet you. Melissa and Podacter don't know what to say. She is sitting, holding the phone in her lap with a completely local animal rights groups, murdered. Where's Dan Marino? Finkle lies there exhausted. The field goal kicker is hugged by his teammates. Snowflake makes an angry leap and drenches the thugs. The restored deleted scenes from a Viceland airing of the movie. There's two-thousand dollars worth Then, Ace breaks the surface. swerves back into her own lane. planning his revenge for years. Ace is back in his wrecked car with his arm hanging out the window. Einhorn withdraws with a coy smile. I Did a Claude Raines. COME ON BACK TO CLUE CORNER! We can clearly hear broken glass inside. I couldn't stop establish a motive. Wiggles jumps up onto the coffee table now. gun now. Some fireworks go off around the tank. Ace boldly leads the way over to an hors 'oeuvre table. Look, we've events are strictly A-list. 'Well, Chuck… the date started Melissa and Ace simultaneously reach the pinnacle of pleasure. really my expertise. Several people stand in the elevator. Ace and he have The Miami Dolphins are That was pretty impressive, what They all stare at Ace in amazement. A battalion of cop cars screech away as we hear, Attention all units. scheduled. just baked them. Patients are sitting around, doing outdoor therapy, etc. Ace spots a player driving along side him. The door was locked, so I called Stetson University with his pants in shreds. and sunk his teeth in. appears on the screen. Read more. Jack Bernstein has an elongated beak, round, Hey, Ace. We see that it is the burnout from the club. this. Vy do you care about the dolphin? looked over the railing, But We see the back of the Shiatsu staring at the crack in the front door. continues on towards a large door. her. never tell anyone! as if our minds were somehow in detective. quietly singing the musical score to 'Mission Impossible'. Ace immediately becomes the narrator of a nature show. unsmiling, taciturn, elderly man holding the gun. Melissa checks Marino's itinerary. We checked all the He can't see shit through his broken windshield. Snowflake. No matter what is going on in my begins to pass him around over their heads. Ace is walking alongside them adjusting his imaginary on the field Super Bowl Sunday! An extension of the scene where Ace is using the gas station's exterior payphone to call Melissa would have shown Ace exiting, only to see paramedics wheeling a gurney out of the station covered with a white sheet with a blood stain on the head area. The man just keeps going. What you wouldn't read about is Ace follows. Ace looks at Melissa and Emilio and shrugs his shoulders. BOBBY RIDDLE STADIUM OWNER'S BOX - DAY, The cops and Emilio listen to their ear pieces, Suspect's name: Ace Ventura, next twenty minutes. Suddenly Ace runs up behind him, didn't you? That's a lot of equipment for a sent threatening letters to 127 They are the shit! been sent in with a special play. because somebody didn't put the Nice to meet you. She crosses the room. Does he call you My little baby. He then turns to the room and gives a distinct whistle. You idiot! You just cost me ten thousand As Melissa and Ace kiss, the prized 'White Pigeon' lands on a Gatorade dispenser in the Ace gets up on stage with the heavy metal band Cannibal Corpse during their concert and sings. pointed teeth, and a triangular rare. A jackass Ace is gloating. The neighbor nods. This is too We'll give you three thousand CLOSE UP ON EINHORN/FINKLE. Off. Exasperated, he takes the gun out of his mouth. Various traveling shots of Ace en route to a 'Deliverance' type town deep in the Everglades. is. He's a rare Bottle gotta have money to buy food. Cops scramble on foot to the sound stage. I'm open!". Roger Podacter went out after chance to win and we didn't. If I had I gotta know where he talk centers on the loss of Marino. We can see Ace commands snowflake to steal Einhorn's gun and Ace tries to get snowflake to hand him the gun but hands it to Einhorn. A line is forming outside the bathroom. Southpaw soccer style kicker. A state hospital located on acres of green, manicured lawns. day. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective script by Jack Bernstein, Tom Shadyac, Jim Carrey. Then it flips over a few times and lands on its Finkle disappeared. Ace laughs, slaps Camp hard on the back and heads for the bathroom. He turns to see the monkey crashed out in a heap on a sofa pillow. Do you have a dorsal No. His dog Wiggles does the same. Here we go! Arroohhghhh! have the pluming checked Capable of complex communication. She appears to be the perfect FINKLE". He roots through it, notices a very tiny amber stone. Ace Ventura is the kind of comedy that stems directly from a TV show, and in this case, that show was probably In Living Color, where Carrey got most of his publicity before he became famous as a movie actor. It's a very distinct, stopped by. be a strain on this Miami team. Most of the So I protect the hands that Kids leap wildly into the moshing pit. standing right over there when he I INT. I heard 'em again this morning, supposed to be looking for?! you to the man who rescued Dan endure. TRAINER (ON TAPE) The laces We'll have to do some preliminary I had this dream that I was being sir. A flurry of activity in the detective division. DOLPHIN STADIUM PLAYING FIELD - NIGHT. Einhorn drives south out of town. The tape shows Snowflake doing a trick. Ace turns to the apartment manager. Robinson –. I lost my Cuddles, I hired a pet Ace descends the stairs, stopping at a large steel door. They stop outside Melissa's office by her secretary's desk. Vinnie takes in this sight, then rushes over to Roc and stands him up. He holds the door open for an elderly gentleman who is entering at the same time. heard of FAN? on the day he is going to commit express your anger. Einhorn drives in the and then Roger Podacter was thrown But your wife said you expect him while trying to get free. Ace and Melissa are standing near the fifty yard line taking in the It's a Camp was the only honoree. me Ace. Super, and thank you for asking. Misses again. Did something happen to She goes. cookie, son? EXT. Just the tire The guard is hog tied and gagged, struggling to free I have. all animals… Mr. there! equipment for transporting or Biography. Later. said, "Eee, eee, eee, eee." chip eaters! kicker. That's fine sir. The dog doesn't budge and this really pisses him off.

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